Monday 6 December 2010

A Weighty Issue

I was in the petrol station a few months ago about to pay when the male cashier spotted the fuel tanker coming down the road about to fill the pumps and muttered ‘tanker time’. He then quickly stated ‘sorry I don’t mean you…no really, I didn’t mean you’.

When I was even slimmer than I am now I was having a go on my cousin’s space hopper in the back garden. Both of my cousins burst out laughing and one said, ‘sorry, I was just thinking you look like a space hopper sat on top of a space hopper’, then the other one laughed, ‘Oh my God, I was just thinking the same thing’.

Luckily I have a good sense of humour but when I’ve got to the stage where someone mentions a tanker and thinks it could be taken to mean me, or where I’ve apparently started to resemble a space hopper, it’s probably time to take drastic action.

After years of struggling with my weight (struggling as in losing a stone then putting two of three on), yoyo dieting on numerous diets and generally seeing my weight go up and up I’ve decided to have a gastric band to help me control my eating habits. I hadn’t realised until researching the band that you still have to follow a diet and that if you choose to eat chocolate or other foods that will ‘slip’ through the band easily, you won’t loose any weight, but after researching it all and having a full consultation I’ve decided it’s the right choice for me. It’s certainly not a quick fix and I will still have to work hard to lose the weight, but the band will help me not to feel so hungry and will help me limit my portions, something which I massively struggle with as I’m a real binge eater and am obsessive about food; food is very much my heroin.


My family have been super supportive in helping me afford the op and at the moment I’m on my pre-op diet of Slim Fast, Muller yoghurt and low calorie drinks ready for my op on Wednesday. This liquid diet will continue for a few weeks after my operation to kick start my weight loss and allow my band to settle in before my first ‘fill’, where they inject saline into my band to make it tighten and restrict the amount I can eat. Everyone keeps asking if I’m nervous but I can honestly say I’m not. I’m really excited and massively looking forward to loosing weight for my birthday (28th Jan). Some people think I’m mad having the op before the ‘biggest eating festival known to man…it’s CHRISTMAS!’ as I keep being told, but by January I could easily be a stone heavier and I don’t want to feel quite so overweight for my birthday.

As my weight’s gone up and up I can no longer really wear the vintage clothes I love as even if I find them in my size they just don’t sit properly. I’m a short (or petite) 5’2 and am approx. a 14 and a half stone pear shape at the moment and am hoping to get down to around 10 or 10 and a half stone eventually. According to medical weights and BMIs I should be about 8 to 9 stone, but I’ve never been thin and I don’t think it would suit me. I’m aiming for the slim but round look as my bum and hips will always be big and I’m happy with that, as long as I’ve got a tiny waist to go with them (which naturally I’m meant to have).

I've bought this dress and once I've lost some weight I'm hoping to look more 'Holly Willoughby' in it than Mrs Bridges

I’m only in hospital overnight and have wifi and a flat screen TV in my room, so as long as I’m not too zonked by the anaesthetic I’m sure I’ll be straight back on Blogger reading all my favourite blogs. In the meantime I’m off to have a nutritious and delicious Slim Fast and try to convince myself that it really is delicious. They started nice, but after two days of them…hmmm.

21 comments:

  1. Good luck with everything. Holly is so pretty!
    x

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  2. Good Luck! I know whats its like to struggle with weight, I used to be 3 stone heavier then I am now, lost it then put on nearly two stone last year. Ive lost 12 pounds so far but still want to lose another 10 pounds. Ill always be a yo yo dieter, I enjoy food too much! I genuinely love eating!

    Sophie

    http://storyofmylife-sophiesoph.blogspot.com/

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  3. good luck you. I'll be joing you on 'the diet' post christmas. As i'm tall i can put on weight with out really noticing, but its got too much (doesn't it always!). will keep my fingers crossed that all goes well and that it does for you what you want it too. x

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  4. Good luck, you've got to do what feels right for you :) x

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  5. Good Luck with the op :0) I'm sure you will be back on here asap xxx

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  6. Good luck from me - I am also on a pre Christmas diet. I do not put weight on easily but I do like my chocolates so as I know people will be buying me loads I thought I would loose half a stone and then I can feel Ok delving into those boxes while watching Doctor Who on Christmas day.
    Beverley x

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  7. Good luck. I have a friend in the States who had this op done a couple of months ago and though she had a few problems at first she still thinks it's the best thing she ever did.

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  8. Good for you. Hope everything goes ok with the op and the weight just falls off leaving you "just the right size" Lucey xx

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  9. Good luck for Wednesday - hope that everything goes well ... you will feel fabulous for your birthday!

    I've always struggled wit my weight ... I lost 5 stone 10 years ago ...and it has gradually crept back on - along with another stone following the birth of my babe! I'm back on Weight Watchers and hoping that I will be able to lose the extra baggage!

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  10. You must have gone through so much with your weight issues, good on you. I lost 5 stone with Slimming world (I run classes now) It takes a long time to alter our food issues. Its been over 11 years since my weight loss and its only in the last couple of years where I've been able to eat want I want and want what I eat! You'll do it, all the best.

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  11. Good luck, hope it goes well. To make it more intersting can you not turn your shakes into ice lollies and ice cream....just an idea but it would make them take longer to eat so would maybe trick you into feeling fuller x

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  12. I think you are very brave. Good luck - I really hope it all goes well for you.
    Dawn
    x

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  13. My birthday is the same day as yours - I too am on a diet so hopefully we'll both be lots slimmer by our birthday! Good luck for Wednesday.
    Sally
    xxx

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  14. Wow you're brave. Best of luck. x

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  15. All the very best for the op honey, I know how you feel! I have been the same since I was 12 (now 36) yo-yoing up and down, I have fought hard to accept that I'm big but never will believe it and want to be thinner, sorry for rambling just want to say I know how you feel.
    Will be thinking of you, good job you have a fab Mum to help you through it!
    Kandi x

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  16. Good luck, lovely..everything will go well.
    Take care.
    xxx

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  17. Good Luck hunni, hope all goes well!

    I'm a struggler myself!... i lost a good 2 stone this year for my jolly hols, and its just creeped back on. I know I wouldnt have enjoyed my hols if I went the way I was.

    I blame it on work as I dont get out of the house, and I end up getting really down in the dumps.

    I just need to get myself back into the routine. I will never be a skinny minnie, I know that.. even when i was erm slimmer (i have never ever been a stick thin person) I always judged myself against my friends and never felt pretty; always felt the horrible bigger one that no one would like!

    At the moment; I'm back into that stage of I hate what I look like; I get myself sooo down when I try something on and realise I look a mess; or just looking at all of the pretty things i could wear and I just dont have the nerve/ wont look good in any of it.
    Eek this has turned into a bit of a rant.. Im sorry.
    I hope all goes well hun! I need to get myself back on track xxx

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  18. Ahh chick, sorry I missed this post. I am so sorry for the rotten comments you have mentioned here.

    I totally understand where you are coming from, I posted a few weeks ago saying I was on a diet and then spent two weeks on this ridiculous meal replacement diet that has put me off milkshakes for life. I lost 8lb and I don't think I have put it on...but I have realised that going on a diet, for me, isn't going to solve a damn thing. I need to heal my relationship with food.

    Anyway, we all have to do what is best for ourselves. Best of luck hun xxx

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  19. But even if you aren't happy with you, you look super pretty in your profile pic. You can always lose a little weight but you can't make a minger pretty lol xx

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I really appreciate all of your comments even if I don't always get chance to reply to them all x